"The daily feedback she gets from the women converges into one message: none of these programs actually improve our lives in a meaningful way."
This is from an article in Korea Times about Korea's multiculturalism policy based from a Vietnamese married immigrant translator.
Keeping the marriages intact. Pointless.
"comes naturally as long as your way of thinking aligns with your partner."
I beg to disagree. It won't come naturally because of cultural differences. It will take hard work and education for some to be able to come to terms on that.
"And the situation is worse for older couples in their 20th year of marriage or more — around the time when Korean husbands become too old to work."
This is a sad reality for us as well. All because of following my heart.
I have to stop here or I will spiral into another round of depression.
Wednesday, December 26, 2018
Thursday, December 20, 2018
Bags
I don't like shoulder bags. I prefer backpacks, cross body bags or totes in that order. I remember a couple of backpacks that I used to have back in high school. One was a small almost-notebook size one good enough for my afternoon classes or simply hanging out with friends. This was a green one with my nickname sewed on the flap. There was also another dark green that my mom got from a direct selling company. It was a versatile one as it can be a backpack or a shoulder bag if folded and zipped up. I liked those bags. It just dawned on me now that both were green. Well, we used to wear green skirts as our school uniform so it was just blending it in.
Then there was another backpack l, denim brown one this time that I bought when I was in university. I never really realized that I don't exactly like brown at that time and I thought that the color went well with our flesh-colored school uniform. I really liked it at that time but the big buckles and the general weight and bulkiness started to become an issue for me that I found myself hardly using it. Instead, I would end up using a small tote and even exchange that with a close friend's tote at times just to change things up.
Ah! The good times we had just hanging out together. School days were almost always fun. The stories of bags, shoes, clothes and friend from those periods. I was never really the straight A student but I didn't hate school. I enjoyed learning new things and spending time with people I like. Fun simply meant hanging out with friends anywhere, alcohol and smoke-free.
We spent time hanging out on the top floor of the administration building watching the green and blue scenery as well the clouds and people below. I may not have made the best grades but I was doing okay for most subjects. I had a life even though it wasn't a very active one. In every school level that I had been through, I had met at least a friend or two that would be enough to last me a lifetime. I don't know how I ended up with friends to bags but let me just end this post here. It's getting cold out here.
Then there was another backpack l, denim brown one this time that I bought when I was in university. I never really realized that I don't exactly like brown at that time and I thought that the color went well with our flesh-colored school uniform. I really liked it at that time but the big buckles and the general weight and bulkiness started to become an issue for me that I found myself hardly using it. Instead, I would end up using a small tote and even exchange that with a close friend's tote at times just to change things up.
Ah! The good times we had just hanging out together. School days were almost always fun. The stories of bags, shoes, clothes and friend from those periods. I was never really the straight A student but I didn't hate school. I enjoyed learning new things and spending time with people I like. Fun simply meant hanging out with friends anywhere, alcohol and smoke-free.
We spent time hanging out on the top floor of the administration building watching the green and blue scenery as well the clouds and people below. I may not have made the best grades but I was doing okay for most subjects. I had a life even though it wasn't a very active one. In every school level that I had been through, I had met at least a friend or two that would be enough to last me a lifetime. I don't know how I ended up with friends to bags but let me just end this post here. It's getting cold out here.
posted from Bloggeroid in the car.
Tuesday, December 11, 2018
The Plus and Minus in Our Life
I often wondered why is it that a baby comes into a family and someone passes away. I know, there are coincidences and it doesn't happen that way all the time but I always had this slight feeling at the back of my mind that I wouldn't want to bring about a death in the family because of a baby. Absurd, illogical and crazy. Yes. I am totally consciously abandoning that ridiculous idea.
But on the other hand, I just realized today that birth does equate a passing of a loved one. Not totally of course, but it does make us fill in the vacuum of losing someone. Somehow, it gives us a way to make our grieving less painful. It helps us cope with losing someone dear.
These past two years had been really heart-breaking for my father's side of the family. My father has 2 older sisters and 1 younger sister. Except for the oldest one, all of them live in our hometown. Their relationships had not been perfect all these years with occasional feuds and mishaps but they still manage to pull through together somehow. After all, family is family with a good sense of value. He is closest to the second older sister and us kids/cousins had grown up with our aunts and uncles around, especially the ones who live near. But now...it's just so sad to think about it.
Last year, the youngest sister's husband was the first one who passed away due to cancer in the internal organ. A few months later, his wife got hit by a vehicle and died. They have a daughter who was married but separated and childless. I hope she finds happiness again in the future; be it a husband, a child, a profession, a calling, --- a place.
October this year, the second older passed away after battling with her kidney. She had been doing dialysis since last January, about the time that I and my son went back to my hometown for a visit. I knew that I might not see her anytime soon again. She was my favorite aunt and it breaks my heart to see her health go just like that. Still, she was not an easy patient to deal with. That will be one pun.
After she died, her husband passed away silently on his chair one early morning. He did have his own health battles to deal with for years already but he was tough. He smoked, he drank and ate anything but vegetables. He still outlived his wife even if only for a few weeks.
Fortunately, I was able to spend some time with them early this year. It is at this point when they are old, unhealthy and needs caregivers that it's just human nature to show them back that we care. Sadly, that is not the usual case for other developed countries anymore.
I had the chance to be with my aunt at the hospital, visit them at home, assist my uncle put meds on his eyes, massage to my aunt's swollen legs, at least be there even for the short time that we were in town.
My uncle will be buried tomorrow, leaving my cousin behind who had already buried her one and only younger brother years ago, and her mom just a few weeks ago. She must have a very strong heart for God to have given here these cards.
How many times I would find tears flowing freely these following days, weeks and months..I don't know. Fall and winter had left me with a sad note this year. I just pray that I will get through this winter with a stronger heart and a hopeful view for the next spring season.
There is a reason why one of my favorite verse is Eccl. 3:1-8 and a song that I can loop play is Vivaldi's Four Seasons.
credits to https://jrbpublications.com for the above photo |
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