Due to my own papers to write last week, I wasn't able to follow how the book tax issue went. it seems that I missed the most important update on it here. Philstar covered it, thank goodness. There's still hope for our nation to start reading again.
I am not entirely a big fan of politics, but thank you Madame President for puting your foot down on this issue.
Thursday, May 28, 2009
A time for Introspection
Today is a day to introspect.
School enrollment season is here again. I have been contemplating if I should enroll again this sem or take a break for now. My son is going to be 5 soon and and I have only a year or two to prepare him for schooling. I am not really sure if I should forgo my own education for now that he is still under six. I have been considering and hoping to try to homeschool him instead of regular school. I am not very enthusiatic in the regular set up of school, starting with the unimaginable fees, uniforms, enrollment systems, school stuff shopping, and others. As usual, I always end up going against the grain.
If we are goingto homeschool, I should study now to improve my teaching skills some more and while he' still doesn't require great attention in studying. If he's going for the regular, I can study later when he starts grade school.
That brings me to the decision at hand. I have to clean up some subjects I left unfinished. I may take a break this term or next. But I only have three more subjects before I can qualify for the comprehensive examination and start wring a problem paper. That is still a thing for me to consider. At least, I finish the subjects and decide the next step later on.
On the other hand, it saddens me to think that something is missing in my little boy's childhood life. It might be almost same or even worse than mine. I don't think if he would have any "childhood friend" to consider. Perhaps, I really should take my hubby's proposal of letting him attend that neighborhood center. Or another would be make my own center at home. I like the idea but would it be something I can do? How will I start? Can I keep it up, along with my own studies if ever I decide to do both things? sigh...
What will I do?
School enrollment season is here again. I have been contemplating if I should enroll again this sem or take a break for now. My son is going to be 5 soon and and I have only a year or two to prepare him for schooling. I am not really sure if I should forgo my own education for now that he is still under six. I have been considering and hoping to try to homeschool him instead of regular school. I am not very enthusiatic in the regular set up of school, starting with the unimaginable fees, uniforms, enrollment systems, school stuff shopping, and others. As usual, I always end up going against the grain.
If we are goingto homeschool, I should study now to improve my teaching skills some more and while he' still doesn't require great attention in studying. If he's going for the regular, I can study later when he starts grade school.
That brings me to the decision at hand. I have to clean up some subjects I left unfinished. I may take a break this term or next. But I only have three more subjects before I can qualify for the comprehensive examination and start wring a problem paper. That is still a thing for me to consider. At least, I finish the subjects and decide the next step later on.
On the other hand, it saddens me to think that something is missing in my little boy's childhood life. It might be almost same or even worse than mine. I don't think if he would have any "childhood friend" to consider. Perhaps, I really should take my hubby's proposal of letting him attend that neighborhood center. Or another would be make my own center at home. I like the idea but would it be something I can do? How will I start? Can I keep it up, along with my own studies if ever I decide to do both things? sigh...
What will I do?
From birthdays to children's day and culture contrasts
A conversation on planning how to spend one's birthday spurned a thought on the stark culture contrast.
Culture wise, when it someone's birthday, the celebrant is sort of expected to throw a "bash" or some sort. Well, of course, it could be just a one-dish affair to share with family and friends. And having one that is sometime between Mother's day and Father's day can be tricky. In a span of 30 days, there would be some sort of that kind of "dilemma." Why? hmm...
DD was just pointing that out and mentioned how come there isn't a big Children's Day here. Uhmm..I am not really sure when but I think it's sometime around the 4th quarter of the year. Googled it up, one site mentions Oct 17 (Christian site), another one has Nov. 20 (Universal Children's Day). This is can be confusing. But the reality, there's isn't really much hype to this day in this part of the world.
In comparison to my hubbys home country, it is a big one for the kids. That is something that he always points out. This is what I have to say. It may not be that big here for a day but it is everyday, or culturally.
Case point no. 1. The local culture here is usually in favor of children. Take the simple food serving on a meal. In our culture, the youngest ones are served first and given their choice of share. Perhaps, this is because kids can be very "demanding" at times or it can be quite convenient for the adults to satisfy the wee ones first. But of course, when it is a "really old one," like grandparents, the kids are also taught to honor to get granny's plates filled first. On the other hand, it is an exact opposite with their culture of serving the oldest ones first. Uhmm, I may haven't seen a lot but with my hubby and family, they do point out that older ones gets serve first, as the culture has been. Of course, I do remember some occasion that they chose to forego that culture.
Case point no. 2. My country's population consists of a great number of children. It's quite easy to take that fact for granted. It can even be blamed for the widespread poverty of the nation. Hubby's country has a very limited and dwindling birth rate. No wonder they have to make the Children's Day big. (;-) Although, I do believe there was a story on the importance of that regard.
Kidding aside, there is really a stark contrast on culture between two nations. It takes an utmost care to balance the similarities and differences in order not to start the 3rd World War.
Culture wise, when it someone's birthday, the celebrant is sort of expected to throw a "bash" or some sort. Well, of course, it could be just a one-dish affair to share with family and friends. And having one that is sometime between Mother's day and Father's day can be tricky. In a span of 30 days, there would be some sort of that kind of "dilemma." Why? hmm...
DD was just pointing that out and mentioned how come there isn't a big Children's Day here. Uhmm..I am not really sure when but I think it's sometime around the 4th quarter of the year. Googled it up, one site mentions Oct 17 (Christian site), another one has Nov. 20 (Universal Children's Day). This is can be confusing. But the reality, there's isn't really much hype to this day in this part of the world.
In comparison to my hubbys home country, it is a big one for the kids. That is something that he always points out. This is what I have to say. It may not be that big here for a day but it is everyday, or culturally.
Case point no. 1. The local culture here is usually in favor of children. Take the simple food serving on a meal. In our culture, the youngest ones are served first and given their choice of share. Perhaps, this is because kids can be very "demanding" at times or it can be quite convenient for the adults to satisfy the wee ones first. But of course, when it is a "really old one," like grandparents, the kids are also taught to honor to get granny's plates filled first. On the other hand, it is an exact opposite with their culture of serving the oldest ones first. Uhmm, I may haven't seen a lot but with my hubby and family, they do point out that older ones gets serve first, as the culture has been. Of course, I do remember some occasion that they chose to forego that culture.
Case point no. 2. My country's population consists of a great number of children. It's quite easy to take that fact for granted. It can even be blamed for the widespread poverty of the nation. Hubby's country has a very limited and dwindling birth rate. No wonder they have to make the Children's Day big. (;-) Although, I do believe there was a story on the importance of that regard.
Kidding aside, there is really a stark contrast on culture between two nations. It takes an utmost care to balance the similarities and differences in order not to start the 3rd World War.
On Women's Surname
This issue came up again today as I fill up my voter's registration application.
Do I get to keep using my maiden name or what?
Google up the phrase about it and found contrasting ideas.
On the point of keep the maiden name, here are the sites.
(1) from a senate site, pdf file of Sen. Flavier's (dated 2004)
(2) from a consular's office website in Sweden (date Mar. 2003)
(3) from National Commission on the Role of Filipino Women (Mar. 2009)
with RA 386 download, 3 options, and a more liberating interpretation of the Law.
Now, this law is usually interpreted in another way as shown in this site run by religious lawyer. Which one is it really? I am still at loss.
This issue may be trivial but this is legal. ;)
Do I get to keep using my maiden name or what?
Google up the phrase about it and found contrasting ideas.
On the point of keep the maiden name, here are the sites.
(1) from a senate site, pdf file of Sen. Flavier's (dated 2004)
(2) from a consular's office website in Sweden (date Mar. 2003)
(3) from National Commission on the Role of Filipino Women (Mar. 2009)
with RA 386 download, 3 options, and a more liberating interpretation of the Law.
Now, this law is usually interpreted in another way as shown in this site run by religious lawyer. Which one is it really? I am still at loss.
This issue may be trivial but this is legal. ;)
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
More on the suicide news..
Here is a link to an article about the ROK ex Pres suicide.
Below is the statistics report on suicide cases in the world.
Below is the statistics report on suicide cases in the world.
Monday, May 25, 2009
A nation of suicidal nature...
Ex-president commits suicide.
How many foreign Presidents ever committed suicide? That is something that I have to check on history first. Sure, there are typical cases of murder, assassination but suicide? Hmm...culture, personality are factors. This can be a good paper to write on.
In a highly religious country I grew up in, suicide is seen an ultimate sin. Something that is irrevocable (for obvious reasons and beyond), something almost shameful. Why would anybody actually do it is still unfathomable. It's beyond my own comprehension as I was in the belief that it is unpardonable.
This latest news is a big shock indeed. It's quite usual (almost) to hear about famous actors or other personality (showbiz and biz) to commit suicide, but politics? Specially someone who held a very high position of a country.
The late president was uncannily soft-hearted to look at. I used to find his "swagger" entertaining everytime I see footages of him walking. The issues that surrounded him before his death would not have been worth his life, in my opinion. But I guess, he regarded them very highly. Enough to take his own life. Or perhaps, there's more to it than that. We'll never ever know.
One thing for sure, he is now one of statistics in a nation who have a high suicide rate in the world.
How many foreign Presidents ever committed suicide? That is something that I have to check on history first. Sure, there are typical cases of murder, assassination but suicide? Hmm...culture, personality are factors. This can be a good paper to write on.
In a highly religious country I grew up in, suicide is seen an ultimate sin. Something that is irrevocable (for obvious reasons and beyond), something almost shameful. Why would anybody actually do it is still unfathomable. It's beyond my own comprehension as I was in the belief that it is unpardonable.
This latest news is a big shock indeed. It's quite usual (almost) to hear about famous actors or other personality (showbiz and biz) to commit suicide, but politics? Specially someone who held a very high position of a country.
The late president was uncannily soft-hearted to look at. I used to find his "swagger" entertaining everytime I see footages of him walking. The issues that surrounded him before his death would not have been worth his life, in my opinion. But I guess, he regarded them very highly. Enough to take his own life. Or perhaps, there's more to it than that. We'll never ever know.
One thing for sure, he is now one of statistics in a nation who have a high suicide rate in the world.
May 20, 21...pet, excretory system
May 20, 2009
P had a thing with his excretory system today.
In the morning while I was working on the lappy.
He stirred but he didn't get up and say good morning at all.
SO I checked if he was upset or something only to find out something
wet beside him. Uh-oh..I mentioned the wet thing and he said,
"I made a mistake." And after that, tried to bury his face in his hands.
So we had an early wash coz of that.
Later that night when I got home from school, I found the toilet
unflushed with something. So I asked P if he pooped today and he said yes.
This is a first that he did not bother anybody with it.
The father was surprised coz he had no idea about it. Upon further questions,
it turned out that the son just did it all by himself. Asked if what was the DD doing
at that time, son said he was asleep. SO the little boy simply pulled his undies and
went back to what he was watching. No washing (good thing it's a dry thing so not much
skid marks) and flushing. Gross! But looking at it in a way, I am just glad of his try
of independence. Yet, still got a few part to iron out.
A day with P's excretory system.
May 21, 2009
Last week, sometime around May 14 or 15, our dog got out of the fence and did not come back.
Hubby tried to make some story but I'm not just in the mood to put in writing just now.
Anyway, my folks woke us up today with the news that they found the dog around the neighboring vacant lot.
The big lot is quite like a forest still and fenced with barbed wire.
They saw the dogs head trying to get out of it but since the space was too small,
the poor dog got stuck. They tried to get her out but he rans away from them.
My folks thought about bringing my son to there to coax the dog out.
Good thing is when we got there, she did recognize us. After a few tries and hesitation,
the dog finally got out and went home with us.
Our dog is finally back home, but the thing is we lost her dog dish.;)
I am quite relieved that she's back home and safe. I did feel very bad that she was out in the wild for
almost a week. Ah, I think that was Friday. Almost a week indeed.
I have yet to evaluate my son's reaction and other stories
around this disappearance and homecoming.
P had a thing with his excretory system today.
In the morning while I was working on the lappy.
He stirred but he didn't get up and say good morning at all.
SO I checked if he was upset or something only to find out something
wet beside him. Uh-oh..I mentioned the wet thing and he said,
"I made a mistake." And after that, tried to bury his face in his hands.
So we had an early wash coz of that.
Later that night when I got home from school, I found the toilet
unflushed with something. So I asked P if he pooped today and he said yes.
This is a first that he did not bother anybody with it.
The father was surprised coz he had no idea about it. Upon further questions,
it turned out that the son just did it all by himself. Asked if what was the DD doing
at that time, son said he was asleep. SO the little boy simply pulled his undies and
went back to what he was watching. No washing (good thing it's a dry thing so not much
skid marks) and flushing. Gross! But looking at it in a way, I am just glad of his try
of independence. Yet, still got a few part to iron out.
A day with P's excretory system.
May 21, 2009
Last week, sometime around May 14 or 15, our dog got out of the fence and did not come back.
Hubby tried to make some story but I'm not just in the mood to put in writing just now.
Anyway, my folks woke us up today with the news that they found the dog around the neighboring vacant lot.
The big lot is quite like a forest still and fenced with barbed wire.
They saw the dogs head trying to get out of it but since the space was too small,
the poor dog got stuck. They tried to get her out but he rans away from them.
My folks thought about bringing my son to there to coax the dog out.
Good thing is when we got there, she did recognize us. After a few tries and hesitation,
the dog finally got out and went home with us.
Our dog is finally back home, but the thing is we lost her dog dish.;)
I am quite relieved that she's back home and safe. I did feel very bad that she was out in the wild for
almost a week. Ah, I think that was Friday. Almost a week indeed.
I have yet to evaluate my son's reaction and other stories
around this disappearance and homecoming.
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Repost: Anger
Anger:
A saint asked his disciples, 'Why do we shout in anger? Why do people shout at each other when they are upset?'
Disciples thought for a while, one of them said, 'Because we lose our calm, we shout.'
'But, why shout when the other person is just next to you?' asked the saint. 'Isn't it possible to speak to him or her with a soft voice? Why do you shout at a person when you're angry?'
Disciples gave all kinds of answers, but none satisfied the saint.
Finally he explained, 'When two people are angry at each other, their hearts distance a lot. To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other through that great distance.'
Then the saint asked, 'What happens when two people fall in love? They don't shout at each other but talk softly. Why? Because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is very small.'
The saint continued, 'When they love each other even more, what happens? They do not speak, only whisper and they get even closer to each other in their love. Finally they even need not whisper, they only look at each other and that's all. That is how close two people are when they love each other.'
Moral:
When you argue do not let your hearts get distant, do not say words that distance each other more, else there will come a day when the distance is so great that you will not find the path to return.
A saint asked his disciples, 'Why do we shout in anger? Why do people shout at each other when they are upset?'
Disciples thought for a while, one of them said, 'Because we lose our calm, we shout.'
'But, why shout when the other person is just next to you?' asked the saint. 'Isn't it possible to speak to him or her with a soft voice? Why do you shout at a person when you're angry?'
Disciples gave all kinds of answers, but none satisfied the saint.
Finally he explained, 'When two people are angry at each other, their hearts distance a lot. To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other through that great distance.'
Then the saint asked, 'What happens when two people fall in love? They don't shout at each other but talk softly. Why? Because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is very small.'
The saint continued, 'When they love each other even more, what happens? They do not speak, only whisper and they get even closer to each other in their love. Finally they even need not whisper, they only look at each other and that's all. That is how close two people are when they love each other.'
Moral:
When you argue do not let your hearts get distant, do not say words that distance each other more, else there will come a day when the distance is so great that you will not find the path to return.
Repost: Family
I ran into a stranger as he passed by,
'Oh excuse me please' was my reply.
He said, 'Please excuse me too;
I wasn't watching for you.'
We were very polite, this stranger and I.
We went on our way and we said goodbye.
But at home a different story is told,
How we treat our loved ones, young and old..
Later that day, cooking the evening meal,
My son stood beside me very still.
When I turned, I nearly knocked him down.
'Move out of the way,' I said with a frown.
He walked away, his little heart broken.
I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken.
While I lay awake in bed, God's still
Small voice came to me and said
'While dealing with a stranger,
common courtesy you use,
but the family you love, you seem to abuse.
Go and look on the kitchen floor,
You'll find some flowers there by the door.
Those are the flowers he brought for you.
He picked them himself: pink, yellow and blue
He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise,
you never saw the tears that filled his little eyes.'
By this time, I felt very small,
And now my tears began to fall.
I quietly went and knelt by his bed;
'Wake up, little one, wake up,' I said.
'Are these the flowers you picked for me?'
He smiled, 'I found 'em, out by the tree.
I picked 'em because they're pretty like you.
I knew you'd like 'em, especially the blue.'
I said, 'Son, I'm very sorry for the way I acted today;
I shouldn't have yelled at you that way.'
He said, 'Oh, Mom, that's okay.
I love you anyway.'
I said, 'Son, I love you too,
and I do like the flowers, especially the blue.'
Are you aware that if we died tomorrow, the company
that we are working for could easily replace us in
a matter of days.
But the family we left behind will feel the loss
for the rest of their lives.
And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more
into work than into our own family,
an unwise investment indeed,
don't you think?
So what is behind the story?
Do you know what the word FAMILY means?
FAMILY = (F)ather (A)nd (M)other (I) (L)ove (Y)ou
'Oh excuse me please' was my reply.
He said, 'Please excuse me too;
I wasn't watching for you.'
We were very polite, this stranger and I.
We went on our way and we said goodbye.
But at home a different story is told,
How we treat our loved ones, young and old..
Later that day, cooking the evening meal,
My son stood beside me very still.
When I turned, I nearly knocked him down.
'Move out of the way,' I said with a frown.
He walked away, his little heart broken.
I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken.
While I lay awake in bed, God's still
Small voice came to me and said
'While dealing with a stranger,
common courtesy you use,
but the family you love, you seem to abuse.
Go and look on the kitchen floor,
You'll find some flowers there by the door.
Those are the flowers he brought for you.
He picked them himself: pink, yellow and blue
He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise,
you never saw the tears that filled his little eyes.'
By this time, I felt very small,
And now my tears began to fall.
I quietly went and knelt by his bed;
'Wake up, little one, wake up,' I said.
'Are these the flowers you picked for me?'
He smiled, 'I found 'em, out by the tree.
I picked 'em because they're pretty like you.
I knew you'd like 'em, especially the blue.'
I said, 'Son, I'm very sorry for the way I acted today;
I shouldn't have yelled at you that way.'
He said, 'Oh, Mom, that's okay.
I love you anyway.'
I said, 'Son, I love you too,
and I do like the flowers, especially the blue.'
Are you aware that if we died tomorrow, the company
that we are working for could easily replace us in
a matter of days.
But the family we left behind will feel the loss
for the rest of their lives.
And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more
into work than into our own family,
an unwise investment indeed,
don't you think?
So what is behind the story?
Do you know what the word FAMILY means?
FAMILY = (F)ather (A)nd (M)other (I) (L)ove (Y)ou
Repost: Girls Vs. Women
Girls leave their schedule wide-open and wait for a guy to call and make plans.
Grown women make their own plans and nicely tell the guy to get in where he fits
Girls want to control the man in their life.
Grown women know that if he's truly hers, he doesn't need controlling.
Girls check you for not calling them.
Grown women are too busy to realize you hadn't.
Girls are afraid to be alone.
Grown women revel in it-using it as a time for personal growth.
Girls ignore the good guys.
Grown women ignore the bad guys.
Girls make you come home.
Grown women make you want to come home.
Girls worry about not being pretty and/or good enough for their man.
Grown women know that they are pretty and/or good enough for any man.
Girls try to monopolize all their man's time ( I.e., don't want him hanging with his friends).
Grown women realize that a lil' bit of space makes the 'together time' even more special-and goes to kick it with her own friends!
Girls think a guy crying is weak.
Grown women offer their shoulder and a tissue.
Girls want to be spoiled and 'tell' their man so.
Grown women 'show' him and make him comfortable enough to reciprocate without fear of losing his 'manhood'.
Girls get hurt by one man and make all men pay for it.
Grown women know that that was just one man.
Girls fall in love and chase aimlessly after the object of their affection, ignoring all 'signs'.
Grown women know that sometimes the one you love, don't always love you back-and move on, without bitterness.
Girls will read this and get an attitude.
Grown women will read this and share it with other grown women and their male friends".
Grown women make their own plans and nicely tell the guy to get in where he fits
Girls want to control the man in their life.
Grown women know that if he's truly hers, he doesn't need controlling.
Girls check you for not calling them.
Grown women are too busy to realize you hadn't.
Girls are afraid to be alone.
Grown women revel in it-using it as a time for personal growth.
Girls ignore the good guys.
Grown women ignore the bad guys.
Girls make you come home.
Grown women make you want to come home.
Girls worry about not being pretty and/or good enough for their man.
Grown women know that they are pretty and/or good enough for any man.
Girls try to monopolize all their man's time ( I.e., don't want him hanging with his friends).
Grown women realize that a lil' bit of space makes the 'together time' even more special-and goes to kick it with her own friends!
Girls think a guy crying is weak.
Grown women offer their shoulder and a tissue.
Girls want to be spoiled and 'tell' their man so.
Grown women 'show' him and make him comfortable enough to reciprocate without fear of losing his 'manhood'.
Girls get hurt by one man and make all men pay for it.
Grown women know that that was just one man.
Girls fall in love and chase aimlessly after the object of their affection, ignoring all 'signs'.
Grown women know that sometimes the one you love, don't always love you back-and move on, without bitterness.
Girls will read this and get an attitude.
Grown women will read this and share it with other grown women and their male friends".
Repost:Good reads for today..divorce
When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, "I've got something to tell you." She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. "I want a divorce." I raised the topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, "Why?" I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, "You are not a man!"
That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Dew. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her! With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.
She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.
The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.
In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage. This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.
I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. "No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce." she said scornfully.
My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, "Ddaddy is holding mummy in his arms." His words brought me a sense of pain.
From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; "Don't tell our son about the divorce." I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.
She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, "All my dresses have grown bigger." I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly it hit me ... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.
Our son came in at the moment and said, "Dad, it's time to carry mum out." To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.
But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind, I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, "Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore."
She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. "Do you have a fever?" She said.
I moved her hand off my head. "Sorry, Dew," I said, "I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us part."
Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us part.
The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank, blah..blah..blah. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy.
Source: online, repost
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, "Why?" I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, "You are not a man!"
That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Dew. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her! With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.
She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.
The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.
In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage. This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.
I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. "No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce." she said scornfully.
My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, "Ddaddy is holding mummy in his arms." His words brought me a sense of pain.
From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; "Don't tell our son about the divorce." I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.
She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, "All my dresses have grown bigger." I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly it hit me ... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.
Our son came in at the moment and said, "Dad, it's time to carry mum out." To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.
But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind, I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, "Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore."
She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. "Do you have a fever?" She said.
I moved her hand off my head. "Sorry, Dew," I said, "I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us part."
Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us part.
The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank, blah..blah..blah. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy.
Source: online, repost
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Idiot Nation? -- the Non-Reading Culture of Philippines
This past few weeks that I had been reading online newspaper can truly be beneficial or annoying, both at the same time. The issue on tax on books that had started surfacing around the first week of this month really is something for the public to take notice of more than that of Pacquiao's mother birthday bash.
I can only sigh and think if there's anything I can do about it. An editorial on taxes on books is published in the Inquirer newpaper today. Hopefully, other people will be able to check it out and let their minds be felt.
Here is the editorial page link. Also other here and here from previously published regarding this issue.
I can only sigh and think if there's anything I can do about it. An editorial on taxes on books is published in the Inquirer newpaper today. Hopefully, other people will be able to check it out and let their minds be felt.
Here is the editorial page link. Also other here and here from previously published regarding this issue.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
S Club 7, Charlotte's Web, and Origami
Homework brought me to an interesting find on the web; an origami site which is very easy to figure out and follow. I can finally try my hand at some paper folding with my son one of these days. I still got the little box of origami paper I had saved a couple of years ago.
Another find today are the music back in the late 90's and early 2000's. A little upbeat travel back in time.
And after the music, I'd occasionally yearn to listen to some story of another genre so I decided on Charlotte's Web for this month. If I can't find the time to read, I might as well listen to it. What I got was a BBC drama. It might have been better if it was the audio book but this will do for now.
Better get started on it. ;)
Another find today are the music back in the late 90's and early 2000's. A little upbeat travel back in time.
And after the music, I'd occasionally yearn to listen to some story of another genre so I decided on Charlotte's Web for this month. If I can't find the time to read, I might as well listen to it. What I got was a BBC drama. It might have been better if it was the audio book but this will do for now.
Better get started on it. ;)
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
The Tale of Second-hand Clothes
This isn't a trail of a piece of clothing but a musing on how in the world these second hand items end up in here?
The second-hand clothes stores, or "ukay" as popularly known, are continually sprouting in every part of the city. There are more stores compared to twenty years or so ago. I do remember my grandmother always have these interesting finds whenever she comes home from the market. These stores are usually found near the market where every person from all walks of life would have to take notice somehow or the other, even if they really not very keen on buying one. There were mostly clothes where my grandma would get her church clothes. She sure hoarded a lot of it during her lifetime.
Fast forward to more than twenty-years, the number of stores have more than doubled, even tripled. These can be found around the market, along the high-way, the main streets and sometimes in surprising places. And some had also specialized into shoes and bags, aside from the common things like clothes. These make me wonder how these clothes ended up here. The labels would usually indicate that they were made in the China, Korea, Japan, U.S. and occasionally South Americas. These are really interesting finds for someone interested in geography. ;)
With a few hesitation before on the idea of diving into the mounds of "ukay", I found myself doing it every now and then. There was more than one occasion that I really scoured quite a number of stores in one whole sunny afternoon. It wasn't really a casual shopping but a dead on quest on making the most of my budget. Yet, sometimes, I wonder if am I really paying fair for the clothes? Some are almost new, with tags that shouts 1$ price but would sometimes be sold a quarter more or double the price even. This is really just ironic. I do have an idea that these products can actually be just donations or trash of other people from other land. Those who cannot live to wear a minutely-stained top or something of that sort, or those who really have no more space in their closets.
It reminded me more than once when we had to move and had to get rid of some clothes that we won't be bringing since we won't be using them in our destination. We put the stuff in a recyle bin late night and I really thought at that time who would end up using the stuff. Some of those were really heartbreaking to part with coz of quality but practicality means we won't be using it at all after the move. I was almost sure that some of those made its way to a second-hand clothes' shop. The same thing that recylcable items collected from every apartment every week. These are mix of kids clothes usually, along with bags, shoes, and even books. Must be very interesting really how one man's trash be another man's treasure.
This really make me wonder how these items travel and I stumbled on this NY TImes article on how a shirt from NY made it's way to Africa. Now, how about the going to Asia? Upon reading this article, I was "relieved" to found out Asia and South America gets the bettter ones compared to the ones going to Africa. Hmm..it leaves us some interesting thought.
Here is the article.
The second-hand clothes stores, or "ukay" as popularly known, are continually sprouting in every part of the city. There are more stores compared to twenty years or so ago. I do remember my grandmother always have these interesting finds whenever she comes home from the market. These stores are usually found near the market where every person from all walks of life would have to take notice somehow or the other, even if they really not very keen on buying one. There were mostly clothes where my grandma would get her church clothes. She sure hoarded a lot of it during her lifetime.
Fast forward to more than twenty-years, the number of stores have more than doubled, even tripled. These can be found around the market, along the high-way, the main streets and sometimes in surprising places. And some had also specialized into shoes and bags, aside from the common things like clothes. These make me wonder how these clothes ended up here. The labels would usually indicate that they were made in the China, Korea, Japan, U.S. and occasionally South Americas. These are really interesting finds for someone interested in geography. ;)
With a few hesitation before on the idea of diving into the mounds of "ukay", I found myself doing it every now and then. There was more than one occasion that I really scoured quite a number of stores in one whole sunny afternoon. It wasn't really a casual shopping but a dead on quest on making the most of my budget. Yet, sometimes, I wonder if am I really paying fair for the clothes? Some are almost new, with tags that shouts 1$ price but would sometimes be sold a quarter more or double the price even. This is really just ironic. I do have an idea that these products can actually be just donations or trash of other people from other land. Those who cannot live to wear a minutely-stained top or something of that sort, or those who really have no more space in their closets.
It reminded me more than once when we had to move and had to get rid of some clothes that we won't be bringing since we won't be using them in our destination. We put the stuff in a recyle bin late night and I really thought at that time who would end up using the stuff. Some of those were really heartbreaking to part with coz of quality but practicality means we won't be using it at all after the move. I was almost sure that some of those made its way to a second-hand clothes' shop. The same thing that recylcable items collected from every apartment every week. These are mix of kids clothes usually, along with bags, shoes, and even books. Must be very interesting really how one man's trash be another man's treasure.
This really make me wonder how these items travel and I stumbled on this NY TImes article on how a shirt from NY made it's way to Africa. Now, how about the going to Asia? Upon reading this article, I was "relieved" to found out Asia and South America gets the bettter ones compared to the ones going to Africa. Hmm..it leaves us some interesting thought.
Here is the article.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
